Newbie

Hi, my name is Cara and i joined this site yesterday. I have since been reading through the forum and have learnt a few things already.

Im 20 and have been having panic/aniety attacks for the past 7/8 months now. I have only just accepted them and up until a week or so ago, i'd kep them a secret. Im finding it hard to come to terms with, as i never thought anything like this would happen to me.

The attacks hit me in social situations. For example when im out, at the pub, with friends, or with people that i dont know so well. Im finding this devastating as i used to be quite a confident person and now am so embarrased and panicing about panicing that im becoming a bit of a recluse.

The attacks go strait to my stomach, it churns and growls and feels empty, completely hollow, like it may collapse, it cramps and i feel physically sick to the point of sometimes even throwing up. I start sweating, especially my hands and completely tense up. I cant concentrate and can not physically bear people talking to me etc. I just want to disappear or for people to ignore me. Then i usually spend the rest of my time with friends colegues etc trying to think of yet ANOTHER excuse as to why i have to leave early. The only thing that makes the feelings disappear is going home. Now i can barley see the point of going out in the first place, i know how it will make me feel and i know i will only end up coming home early, im worried that im slowly shutting everything out. There are only a few places i feel comfortable being now and thats work, home and my boyfriends house, and that is my life, going from one to the other and back again.

I have been to the doctors and they have given me anti depressants, but they have had no effect so far. Can anyone give me any advice at all, does anyone have the same thing - in social situations?

Cara

Hi Cara

Just to let you know that you are definitely not alone in what you feel. So much of what you say is exactly the same as what I went through.

I have been getting progressively worse for eight years and I reached the point a few months back where I became agoraphobic and wouldn't leave the house at all.

The doctor prescribed an anti-depressant called escitalopram and they started to work after about 5 weeks. I am now feeling quite a bit better and I am going out for walks 3 or 4 times a day (only short ones).

Email me if you ever want to chat - rabid.badger@ntlworld.com

Best of luck

Chris x

Hi Cara,

As Chris said, you're certainly not alone. I think an awful lot of people on this site (and other people you wouldn't expect) have experienced these symptoms. Its important to remember the positives though, that you're still going to work and your boyfriends house, so even if you're feeling down you are fighting this and not letting it completely take over. After that it's usually a case of weening yourself back into other situations a bit at a time. If you just go somewhere else for half an hour, try and think of it as an achievement rather than being sad you didnt stay longer, which is what I usually do and get myself all upset! It's not an easy thing to get over so just be strong and talk to your boyfriend and close friends and tell them how vulnerable you are feeling so you know you have their support.

With a good support network and the medication prescirbed by your doctor things should start to get easier pretty soon. I'm also on escitalopram but have only been taking it for 2 weeks on a low dose and already my physical symptoms are a lot more controlled and I've been able to get out the house a few times. The doc said that it will keep getting better for another 1-3 weeks though so if you're not feeling the effects yet keep persevering.

Hope you start feeling better soon and if you ever need someone to chat to I'm here :)

Sarah x

Hi Cinders

I'm interested to hear that you are taking escitalopram too. For some reason, doctors don't very often prescribe it. I don't know if it's because it's relatively new and doctors tend to stick to what they know. I know it doesn't cost them any more (I make it my business to find out things like that).

It is an oxalate which is absorbed more readily than its predecessor (citalopram) and, therefore, can be prescribed with a lower level of active ingredient (typically 5 or 10mg compared to 20mg citalopram doses). This is why it produces fewer side effects.

Have you experienced any side-effects yourself? I went through a period of about 8 days when I felt very sick but after that everything was ok. I didn't even get the erection problems that normally come with anti-depressants (sorry if that's a bit personal for you but men reading this might be interested).

The real benefits came for me after about 4-5 weeks so you should hopefully be feeling a lot better soon.

Anyway, my email address is above if you ever want to talk.

Best wishes

Chris x

I sympathise with your symptoms. I'm now 56 but for many years I had exactly
the same thing whilst out/going to restaurants etc. Just felt as if I wanted to
escape and it would all go away. The one thing that did help was at the peak of
the 'attack' just excuse yourself, go to the loo where it's quiet. Try using the
deep breathing technique, mouth closed, deep breath in through your
nose, hold breath for count of five and then let breath out slowly through
your mouth. It won't come immediately, but if you can get into a rhythm of
this, it does help. Don't try doing this amongst people, just go into the loo
and 'cool down'. If you need to 'escape' to 'come down' a couple of times,
you can always say 'think I've got a chill!" or something like that. I used to
use loads of excuses!! When you realise you've got an 'escape' it may
make you realise you're not trapped!!

Good Luck

Gill R

Thanks for all of your replies, i appreciate it a lot, and it feels nice to hear some say 'i understand' or 'i know how you feel'. My Family, friends and boyfriend have all been so supportive so far. But i sometimes worry they think i am just being silly.

I have been reading a book by Claire Weeks and i have done quite a lot of research on the internet. All of which advises people to face their fears, put themselves in situations they know they will have an attack, it seems scary, but, would you advise this? I mean, with some coping techniques will this help me to over come my fears? To face them?

I have been taking the tablets for just two weeks now, so maybe i should give them more time,

Many Thanks,


Cara

Glad you realise you're not alone now Cara, and some people who have never experience panic attacks before do find it difficult to relate but dont worry, nobody is judging you they're just trying to understand :) People find different treatments and therapies effective rather than there being some that are better than others. Personally I dont like the 'diving straight in' method where you just throw yoursef in at the deep end because I lose my confidence with going out the next time. I find it much better to take little steps. If you start doing something that doesnt scare you too much and dont have a panic attack you may have more confidence to go a step further and another step and another. That's my personal philosophy anyway but always do what you feel will be best for you! And yes your tablets should help you more and more (you've been on yours the same amount of time I've been on mine so I'm relaying what my doctor has said here) so whenever you're ready to venture out you should have that cushion working for you.

TO CHRIS- I was also surprised my doc put me on escitalopram but I saw 2 and they both said it was the best for me, but they're both fairly young GP's which makes all the difference with new meds doesn't it. I had a few side effects actually but not as bad as some of the old anti-depressants. I was nauseous for about a week and sometimes had a really heightened anxiety so I had a few bad panic attacks, which passed after about 3 days. I also still have a red rash across my chest (I'm allergic to quite a few medicines so the doc said I'm just a bit sensitive to the hormonal changes and it'll heal soon). All that sounds like I'm moaning but I'm not, it's so much better than I expected and I don't get nervous before swallowing them like I did at the start. I used to have to really psyche myself up just to put it in my mouth! It's just over 2 weeks now and yesterday I went to my boyfriends house for like 4 hours which I havent been able to do since before Christmas. Definately looking good! Hope you're doing well on them too and enjoying those walks you've been taking :)

Hi all

Cinders - I know what you mean about being nervous about swallowing them. When I first started taking them it felt like I was swallowing a suicide pill every time I took one. I would look at the clock and mark off the hours since I'd taken it and be amazed that I was still alive (sounds silly doesn't it).

Cara - The truth is, only people who suffer from a phobia or anxiety know what it's like. Other people try to understand but unless you've been there, you just can't. Think back to a time before your anxiety developed; would you have believed it would be like this? I certainly didn't.

Love to you all

Chris x