jay83
19-05-05, 02:43 AM
Hello everyone,
Its been good reading all of your problems to know I am not the only one. I am generally a happy outgoing girl but in the last few months I have been thinking an awful lot and worrying to the extent that I am worrying about worrying. It just got to the stage where if I didn’t check or couldn’t remember something i.e. locked door, to make sure an appliance was off, that I sent a fax at work I would worry and could not get it out of my mind until I checked it. I work 45 mins from where I live and over the past few weeks I have driven in on the weekend to check that I have done something and made my boyfriend drive past the office to check that I had locked the door (Poor boy he doesn’t even understand how someone can worry about everything the way I do). Any how my breaking point was last Friday night I couldn’t remember sending a fax , that wasn’t even really that important so what did I do, worried about it all Friday night while I was out with my friends, then when I got home I was discussing my issue with my boyfriend and we got really deep into it until I bawled my eyes out, found it hard breathing and basically realised I had a real problem, I think my boyfriend realised I did too. Anyhow I drove into work at 5.30 in the morning and surprise surprise I had sent the fax (as always, I don’t understand why I doubt myself so much) so I drove home booked in with a dr. now I had 2 hrs to wait for my appointment so what did I do, yes I drove all the way back to work and checked that I locked the door. I have been on cipramil since Saturday and am feeling a little better, (less messy and more focussed as I like to call it) Even last night before I went to bed I had a slight moment of total happiness where nothing was wrong, nothing to worry about. (It was the best feeling I have felt for a long long long time).
Well that was a long introduction but I guess I just started typing and couldn’t stop, its so nice to let it all out to people who understand what I am going through and don’t’ think I am a complete werdio. I would love to discus problems with anyone else who wants to share, as much as I am a great talker/typer I am an even best listener/reader.
:D
Its been good reading all of your problems to know I am not the only one. I am generally a happy outgoing girl but in the last few months I have been thinking an awful lot and worrying to the extent that I am worrying about worrying. It just got to the stage where if I didn’t check or couldn’t remember something i.e. locked door, to make sure an appliance was off, that I sent a fax at work I would worry and could not get it out of my mind until I checked it. I work 45 mins from where I live and over the past few weeks I have driven in on the weekend to check that I have done something and made my boyfriend drive past the office to check that I had locked the door (Poor boy he doesn’t even understand how someone can worry about everything the way I do). Any how my breaking point was last Friday night I couldn’t remember sending a fax , that wasn’t even really that important so what did I do, worried about it all Friday night while I was out with my friends, then when I got home I was discussing my issue with my boyfriend and we got really deep into it until I bawled my eyes out, found it hard breathing and basically realised I had a real problem, I think my boyfriend realised I did too. Anyhow I drove into work at 5.30 in the morning and surprise surprise I had sent the fax (as always, I don’t understand why I doubt myself so much) so I drove home booked in with a dr. now I had 2 hrs to wait for my appointment so what did I do, yes I drove all the way back to work and checked that I locked the door. I have been on cipramil since Saturday and am feeling a little better, (less messy and more focussed as I like to call it) Even last night before I went to bed I had a slight moment of total happiness where nothing was wrong, nothing to worry about. (It was the best feeling I have felt for a long long long time).
Well that was a long introduction but I guess I just started typing and couldn’t stop, its so nice to let it all out to people who understand what I am going through and don’t’ think I am a complete werdio. I would love to discus problems with anyone else who wants to share, as much as I am a great talker/typer I am an even best listener/reader.
:D
