Dont know what to do ?

Hi. I am new to this site and am looking for help, advice and any ideas. My daughter who is 20 has been suffering from panic attacks for nearly 2 years. I have tried to understand and be as supportive as possible, but now seem to have run out of ideas. She has tried Hypnotherapy (which helped a little) and has been to the doctor more times than i can remember. Recently they put her on some tablets to try and help her anxiety, but from day one they made her feel sick, have headaches and generaly feel crap. So she stopped taking them and the doc advised to try St. Johns Wart, but you cant take them with the pill and they also made her sick. She has stopped taking anything to give her body a break and recover and has today gone back to work after being off for 3 weeks. She never seems to see the good in anything, its always the negative and what is this happens or that happens, always looking for what will or can go wrong before its happend. She's at the end of her teather now and has started to have thoughts of 'not being here'. Works becoming a problem, not the work itself, but the travelling for numerous reasons including getting stuck in queues etc. She just wants to be like she used to be, outgoing, happy and secure and i want my baby back. Can anyone help pls x

Hi Jerseylass

Welcome to the forum. Sorry to hear about the trouble your daughter is having.

From what you say it sounds like the anxiety and panic attacks have brought about depression, which it often does if it goes on for long enough.

I take anti-depressants myself and the side-effects do go after a while (about 10 days in my case) and they took about 5 weeks to start working on me. The doctor told me that the one I'm taking (escitalopram) is better than others (ie. fewer side-effects).

The best thing you can do to help is probably to not allow her to dwell on things. Talk to her when she's feeling bad - about something other than anxiety. Make her have to think about soemthing else and try, whilst still being compassionate, to make the anxiety less significant. It is only because of the huge significance we give it that anxiety takes such a hold.

I know what it's like to shut yourself away and lose interest in everything and it's very hard to get it back. I do think the tablets have helped me with this.

Physical exercise helps but it is so hard to motivate yourself to start.

Sorry I can't be any more help. Best of luck.

Chris

Cheers Chris, thats a great start, thx. Maybe if she goes back on the tablets it would be best to persevere and the doc said she would change the pills to something else. I'm trying to encourge her to go to college so she gets out more and meets new people as well. She would then only have to work part time, but would hopefully be doing something she enjoys.

hmmm...


My parents have a hard time with me and i've been through the lot where anxiety's concerned and i've been very open and yet they still question me. I have to be very patient and too be honest it's really getting between us so you'll just have to tough it out for the time being.


We, together me & my parents, have tried a range of things including hypnopherapy and loads of doctors and phychiartrists, etc. Unfortunately alot of these sort of people aren't truly bothered and you end up spending alot of money and wasting alot of time.


In my four years of suffering i've gone from being agoraphobic to being fully employed but haven't found peace of mind. I still find alot of things difficult but on the contrary things are getting better and i can say that from the bottom of my heart (it's not some sort of pycho-babble i tell myself looking into the mirror)


Try everything in your power.

Thanks for being so honest. I do try my best to understand but sometimes i feel like giving her a kick up the ass and telling her to get on with it, although thats not the answer and of course i never would. Its so frustrating though. You try and help and find answers but she fights you all the way. At least she went back to work today and phoned me and seemed happy enough.

I agree with Rabidbadger in that the meds are worth a try again maybe...i had side affects for a while too but they do go away,and they do help...i dont know where i would be now if i hadnt taken them to help me out of that horrible place i was at.

I was wondering has your daughter actually been on this site?..has she read through some of the posts and saw how many of us suffering there are...it may help her realise that she is not alone and not so isolated, give her some hope, maybe if she chatted to poeple on here it would be a good thing for her...just an idea.

I think it is great that she has you and when she feels better(and she will), she will never forget that you were there for her when she was at her worst.

Carmel

I've only been suffering panic attacks for a few months and I would honestly not know what do to without my mum (and I'm 25!) I'm not at all in deinal about what is wrong with me I know I have irrational thoughts and blow everything out of proportion. But knowing my mum is only a phone call away she (most of the time) manages to 'talk me in from the ledge'. My advice...be calm, be patient even though you probably feel like screaming at her sometimes. If she is having a bad day don't give her a hard time or make a big deal about it because this will just make her feel worse, just let her talk to you about it, maybe try and get her to go to another doctor but if she doesn't mind go with her as I know when I went to the doctor I always lost control of my emotions and I always felt that if someone had gone with me I might have gotten my point across better.

As for travelling and standing in queues...I have this problem. The only thing I can suggest is making sure she always has her MP3 player on her. If I'm feeling panic in a que I just stick my MP3 player on and distract myself if I start to feel sick, I eat a mint for some reason this helps.

Anyway I hope this has been on some help. x

Jerseylass

My name is Lauren I just turned 22 this yr i would love to talk to your daughter. i live with panic attacks not every day but there is stages where it is worse! I know she can get through it, negative thinking is something ppl with panic disorder do! but i know if we can talk we can give each other strength , motivation and positive thoughts, i bet we would have alot in common also being the same age group!

Tell her to PM me and i will give her my MSN

im just a normal girl, that studys, has a bf , goes out etc...and i am trying to live with the panic disorder too which is sometimes hard or anxiety ..whatever we want to call it lol

Well peace and love

xoxoxo

Lozzie