Need to vent

I am sorry but i feel like I am going to explode. I hate feeling like this, I had a meeting at this place where I volunteer at. It was been very stressful working environment in the past two weeks. I have been going numb again, and my anxiety has been through the roof. In 23 days, I can quit, but I dont know if I can make it. Tonight it seems they were picking on me, I dont want to go through everything, and I am not the kind the thinks they are always the victim, but everything they said was things I do, which is fine, but there is alot more bigger issue going on. I know my faults and I am working on them, but nothing was said about alot of things, and me being the jelly fish I am couldnt say anything, instead I sit there getting physically sick, and then I started going numb,,,,
It has been over for two hours, and I still feel like I need to scream or something, I cant relax at all. I just want to tell people off, but I know I wont,,, and It wont help any if I do... I hate having a bad attitude, I hate it so bad, I use to be the kind that could let things go, but not any more, Its like I stew on things and I cant stop thinking about them,.. One other things is that my "best friend" works there too. and I confided in her about some stuff, and she went and told the bosses, so that is what the meeting was about.... I feel so betrayed and hurt...
I am sorry for going on like this, but I felt if maybe if I wrote it down I could get some relief...
Thanks for reading...

Hi Lou

Two things...

1) People very often criticise other people to hide their own faults - remember this and remember that nobody on the planet is worth any more or less than you are.

2) If you need to scream, scream. It might actually help. What's the worst thing that can happen, you'll look a bit silly? I'm sure you've coped with worse things in the course of you life.

Chris

Hi Lou, hope you manage to calm yourself down..Chris is quite right in what he says :) I think half our problem when we suffer anxiety is we keep our true thoughts and feelings in,scared to upset others..but not ourselves ! lol..well I certainly think thats some of my problem.
Best wishes Lou
jan