MAF
07-12-04, 01:49 PM
Hi,
I have suffered from clinical depression, only diagnosed after my father's death. I believe my mother has suffered from this, too.
I live in the UK, and she lives in Canada. I am the only child. She is suffering from extreme, and understandable anxiety, because she is about to make a major move. Her anxiety takes the form of symptoms of illness, which cause her to retreat. (Her back problems are genuine, but I think exacerbated by anxiety).
She has been saying that she cannot join our family in England for Christmas. She called every day to tell me this and to tell me that I shouldn't worry, and she'd be fine on her own. In our most recent telephone conversation, I asked her - rather brusquely- to see her doctor and tell me if the doctor thought she should not travel. She has decided to come, but I know I bullied her a bit. After all it is hard to be tugged in two directions, but I could hardly imagine leaving her on her own.
My question is - what is the kindest way to help. How can I exhibit sympathy and be honest about my own pressures. My mother does not acknowledge that her issues have any psychological element and has refused medication or counselling.
I have suffered from clinical depression, only diagnosed after my father's death. I believe my mother has suffered from this, too.
I live in the UK, and she lives in Canada. I am the only child. She is suffering from extreme, and understandable anxiety, because she is about to make a major move. Her anxiety takes the form of symptoms of illness, which cause her to retreat. (Her back problems are genuine, but I think exacerbated by anxiety).
She has been saying that she cannot join our family in England for Christmas. She called every day to tell me this and to tell me that I shouldn't worry, and she'd be fine on her own. In our most recent telephone conversation, I asked her - rather brusquely- to see her doctor and tell me if the doctor thought she should not travel. She has decided to come, but I know I bullied her a bit. After all it is hard to be tugged in two directions, but I could hardly imagine leaving her on her own.
My question is - what is the kindest way to help. How can I exhibit sympathy and be honest about my own pressures. My mother does not acknowledge that her issues have any psychological element and has refused medication or counselling.
